Murray Walkerisms

Murraywalkerisms

Welcome to my 200 maddening quotes from Murray Walker site!

Biography-All about Murray | Related Links | Contact Me

image01.jpg

THREE OF THE BEST WALKERISMS OF ALL TIME

"We're watching Ralf Schumacher... son, of course of double world champion Michael Schumacher


"...and HERE COMES DAMON HILL IN THE WILLIAMS!!!!.....this car is absolutely unique!....except for the one behind it....which is exactly the same..."


Murray: "First man out is Marques in the Arrows. Of course he's going out early to generate some media interest"
Martin: "I'm sure he would generate some interest if he went out in the Arrows because Marques drives for Minardi"

getpaidtodosurveys.gif

MORE MEMORABLE QUOTES (INC. DATES & TRACKS)

Australia 2000:
Murray on M Schumacher's fight for championship glory with Ferrari: "...and it's something he's been trying to achieve since he left Benetton in 1958!"

Interview with Mansell after the Austrian GP 1987:
Murray : "How did you get that nasty bumb on your head Nigel?" [Nigel leans forward to show the camera as Murray pokes it with his finger !]
Nigel: "OUCH!!"

From the Spanish GP 1995:
"and Eddie Jordan is in fifth place"... (actually Eddie Irvine)

Italy 1994:
"...the enthusiastic enthusiasts... "

Belgium 1996:
"...and now, just in case there is any CONFUSION this is the race order on lap 19: David Coulthard leads and has yet to stop; Hakkinen leads and has yet to stop..."

Belgium 1996:
"And now the boot is on the other Schumacher"

Monaco 1990:
"And Senna wins the 1999 Monaco Grand Prix"

Belgium 1995:
"And Hill congratulates Schumacher. They're not bosom buddies, but they're not far off!" (Hill was actually critising Schumacher for heavy-handed driving tactics.).

Monaco 1981:
"You might not think that's cricket, and it's not, it's motor racing"

Britain 2000:
Jim R.: "It's over to the big Easter Bunny of Formula 1, Murray Walker."
Murray: "I don't know about the big Easter Bunny, Jim. I used to go to the Bunny Club in Park Lane quite a lot, but my wife's watching the programme so enough of that!"

Spain 2000:
"So while we wait for them to come on to the podium, and I'll interrupt myself when they do..."

Europe 2000:
Murray: "It would be wonderful for David Coulthard, for McLaren and for Britain if he could get Pole Position, because he has yet to get one this year, and I have seldom been anything like as much impressed as I was by his dignity and fortitude in the face of enormous adversity at the British Grand Prix meeting two weeks ago."

Monaco 2000:
"And in front of David Coulthard, the scarlet McLaren of four-times Monaco Grand Prix winner, Michael Schumacher."

Hungary 2000:
"Two lights on, three lights on, four lights on, five laps on..."

Belgium 2000:
"Yes! Jean Alesi has just gone round in 2 minutes and 2 seconds, so that's three seconds faster in the Prost than Alesi in the McLaren."

USA 2000:
"Two World Championship leaders on the front row. Mika Hakkinen, 80 points. Alongside him, Michael Schumacher, 78 points. Mika Hakkinen on the second row of the grid..."

Japan 2000:
Jim Rosenthal: "We're a bit worried about these earthquakes. Did the earth move for you over there?"
Murray: "Not only the earth Jim, but the commentary box as well! It was the most incredible experience."

Malaysia 2000:
Murray: "Wake up on the left, there! This is a terrific race going on."
(A McLaren mechanic is lying down on the garage floor)

Germany 2000: "Well, where's Mr. Half-wit now..."(A half-wit walks across track to protest about his dismissal from his job in a Mercedes factory somewhere. Chaos ensues and Barrichello and Ferrari are eternally grateful.

Belgium 1995: An after-race interview with Damon Hill
Murray: "I have to tell you after the race when you were talking to Michael [Schumacher] I said that it proves that you are good friends with him, was it not that sort of conversation?"
Hill: " Well not suprisingly Murray, you were wrong!"

Germany 1988:
"Senna 1st, Prost 2nd and Berger 3rd that makes up the top four!"

Monaco 1992:
"We're now on the 73rd lap and the next one will be the 74th."

Imola 1994:
"And this is the scene from Ayrton Senna's mirror... sorry, from his camera!"

Belgium 1997:
"It's the second Bennetton victory of the year. It's the second McLaren victory of the year."


Austria 1998:
"If it's a two lap strategy"

Germany 1999:
"... he's on 4 grooved front tyres"


Qualifying, Hungary 1999:
"The McLaren looking as steady as a rock". ... and just as he says this: the McLaren slides and recovers round a bend.


RANDOM QUOTES FROM THE LAST FIFTY YEARS

"I'll stop my startwatch"

"The car in front is absolutely unique, except for the one behind which is identical!"

"He's obviously gone in for a wheel change. I say obviously because I can't see it"

"With half the race gone, there is half the race still to go"

"Anything happens in Grand Prix racing and it usually does"

"Alboreto has dropped back up to fifth place"

"As you look at the first four, the significant thing is that Alboreto is 5th"

"He is shedding buckets of adrenaline in that car"

"and this is the third placed car about to lap the second placed car"

"... Mansell can see him in his earphone..."

Interview with Bernie Ecclestone:
"So Bernie, in the seventeen years since you bought McLaren, which of your many achievements do you think was the most memorable ?"
Bernie : "Well I don't remember buying McLaren."


Murray: "What's that? There's a BODY on the track!!!"
James: "Um, I think that that is a piece of BODY-WORK, from someone's car."

Murray: "There's a fiery glow coming from the back of the Ferrari."
James: "No Murray, that's his rear safety light"

"...and he's lost both right front tyres"

"...Cruel luck for Alesi, second on the grid. That's the first time he had started from the front row in a Grand Prix, having done so in Canada earlier this year..."

"And there's the man in the green flag!"

"...and there's no damage to the car.....except to the car itself."

"And the first five places are filled by five different cars."

"The Italian GP at Monaco..."

"So now you're looking at the battle between Frentzen and Herbert for 7th place. Heinz Harold Frentzen in the Sauber Mercedes behind Johnny Herbert, behind him Johnny Herbert in his first race in the Ligier Renault..."

Murray: "And there are flames coming from the back of Prost's car as he enters the swimming pool."
James: "Well, that should put them out then."

"Alesi is in second place and Hill is in second place..."

"As you can see, visually, with your eyes..."

"Andrea de Cesaris...the man who has won more Grand Prix than anyone else without actually winning one of them."

"Oh that's the Forti, and, it looks like, err, its Roberto Moreno's car , the err Brazilian .. I was going to say the elderly Brazilian , he's only 36 but he's actually the oldest driver in the race at the present moment, though he's just retired from it!"

"....Schumacher crosses the line to start another lap, and there's nothing there!"

"And we have had 5 races so far this year, Brazil, Argentina, Imola, Schumacher and Monaco!"

"And Damon Hill is coming into the pit lane, yes it's Damon Hill coming into the Williamss pit, and Damon Hill in the pit, no it's Michael Schumacher!"

"And the Williams pit are getting ready for Hill, the tyre coolers are coming off"

"Alain Prost is in a commanding second place"

"..and Damon Hill is following Damon Hill"

"with Alesi in 4th and 5th"

"Schumacher has made his final stop three times!"

"Nigel Mansell had a problem with the wheel-nut on his Williams, then he went on to win brilliantly for Ferrari!"

"And the car upside down is a Toyota" (Toyotas slogan is "The car in front is a Toyota")

"It has all come alive in Hungary. There is the proof! Williams! Benetton! Ferrari! The Benetton is Berger and the Ferrari is Damon Hill!"

"And Schumacher overtakes Villeneuve. Oh, no he doesn't! Oh, yes he does!"

"And he's done that in a whisker under 10 seconds, call it 9.7 in round figures".

"I didn't see the time, largely because there wasn't one."

"The two Britons running in second and third, Irvine and Fisichel...Herb...er...oh..."

"and thats one of the mechanics using a feeler gauge to measure the depth of tread in the slick."

Camera cuts to single tyre in the middle of the track. Murray: " And look at that tyre! Someone had better go and get that quickly (As if on cue, marshall runs out and grabs it) WELL DONE LAD!"

"He (Jackie Stewart) will not produce a winner, but if he can produce second, it will be the next best thing."

"And the track temperature has in fact risen in degrees!"

"Well he's world champion, and we only get one of those a year."

"I should imagine that the conditions in the cockpit are unimaginable!"

"And will Jacques Villeneuve be racing with Williams next year? Well, we will only know that in the future."

"the flying Finn in front from Scotland"...

"We're watching Ralf Schumacher... son, of course of double world champion Michael Schumacher"

"And that piece of water on the right is not the St. Lawrence Seaway, it is the Olympic rowing strip which I have walked down."

"A battle is developing between them...I say developing because it's not yet on."

"Schumacher wouldn't have let him past voluntarily. Of course he did it voluntarily, but he had to do it"

"And here is Gabriele Tarquini in 3rd place who has already driven for 31 Formula One Grand Prix teams.... Ahum.... I don't know if we've have that many but Im sure that if we did so Gabriele didn't drive for all of them!!!"

"....and Berger finishes his flying lap to begin a quick one..."

"I can't believe what's happening visually, in front of my eyes".


Murray: "First man out is Marques in the Arrows. Of course he's going out early to generate some media interest"
Martin:"I'm sure he would generate some interest if he went out in the Arrows because Marques drives for Minardi"

"Well, now, Villeneuve is now twelve seconds ahead of Villeneuve"

"I've no idea what Eddie Irvine's orders are, but he's following them superlatively well."

"I don't know my Madrids from my Jerez" (Brundle then chuckled 'shall I cancel my hotel in Madrid then?')

"Frentzen is taking, er..., reducing that gap between himself and Frentzen."

Murray: "Ferrari won't be developing their car anymore this season"
Brundle: "How do you know that?"
Murray: "I was there when I said it"

"They're both super starters, but Mika Hakkinen is a superer starter!"

"There is a man with a great Grand Prix future behind him!"

"There is nothing wrong with the car except that it is on fire."

"The first four cars are both on the same tyres."

"Except for his car, he's the only man on the track."

"And Michael Schumacher is actually in a very good position. He is in last place."

"The crowd holds its joint breath!"

"Look up there! That's the sky!"

"A sad ending, albeit a happy one, here at Montreal for today's Grand Prix."

"All I can tell you is that David Coulthard keeps on accelerating and closing up to David Coulthard."

"I make no apologies for their absence. I'm sorry they're not here."

"He's here again for the first time."

"And Michael Schumacher, as I expected, is now extending his lead over Michael Schumacher!"

"...in 12th and 13th the two Jaguars of Eddie Irvine."
"This is an interesting circuit because it has inclines, and not just up, but down as well."

"Do my eyes deceive me, or is Senna's Lotus sounding rough?"

"Alboreto has dropped back up to fifth place. As you look at the first four, the significant thing
is that Alboreto is 5th."

"I can't imagine what kind of problem Senna has. I imagine it must be some sort of grip problem."

"It's raining and the track is wet."

"and this is the third placed car about to lap the second placed car."

"Schumacher has made his final stop three times!"

"Nigel Mansell had a problem with the wheel-nut on his Williams, then he went on to win brilliantly for Ferrari!"

"The Benetton...handling superbly as ever. Williams have worked very, very hard on this car at the beginning of the season."

"Even in five years' time, he (Coulthard) will still be four years younger than Damon Hill."

"Nigel Mansell is in third position! He's gone up from seventh to sixth to fourth to fifth and now to third!"

"And Nelson Piquet must be furious with himself inside his helmet."

"We now have exactly the same situation as at the beginning of the race, only exactly opposite."

"His hopes, which were nil before, are absolutely zero now."

"Ukyo Katayama is undoubtedly the best Formula One driver that Grand Prix racing has ever produced!"

"Ralf Schumacher has been upstaged by the teenager, Jenson Button, who is 20."

"He can't decide whether to have his visor half open or half closed."

"He's pushing that Mercedes Bengine ... Benz engine ..."

Heinz Harald Frentzen has already won three Grands Prix this year - two of them last year..."

"And for some really superb driving ... watch THIS!!!" (followed by a crash)

"The Arrows is in! The mechanics attack the car!"

"He's lost both right front tyres."

"BMW are entirely new to Formula One. They left it so long ago!"

"With modern technology and fantastic car-to-pits radio, Piquet now knows he can see Prost in front of him."

"The faster he goes the quicker he'll get to the pits. The slower he goes the longer it will take"

"And once again the determination, the sheer grit, the driving skill, and the tactics of Alan Jones allied to the legendary reliability of the Williams car is paying off .... (then) Jones is in TROUBLE!!!"

"Michael Schumacher has just gone round in 1.4 seconds!"

"Schumacher is the fastest man on the track. He's going round quicker than anybody else."

"And now the boot is on the other Schumacher!"

"Schumacher is still the fastest man on the track, not only by virtue of the fact that he leads the Australian Grand Prix, but he also holds the fastest lap."

"Schumacher virtually pedalling his Benetton back with his fists"

"Twenty four points for Schumacher, twenty three points for Hill, so there's only one point between them if my mental arithmetic is correct."

" ... and Edson Arantes di Nascimento, commonly known to us as Pele hands the award to Damon Hill, commonly known to us as ... um... Damon ... Hill ... "

Murray: "And Barrichello has a good chance to pass Trulli here..."
Martin: "Actually, those waved yellow flags will prevent that in this section"

"Once again Damon Hill is modest in defeat."

"STOP! STOP! Under the bridge there! That's a Williams Renault ... my guess is it's Villeneuve, I'm not going to make any statements until we see the driver ... IT'S HILL! It's Damon Hill!"

"But here is now and there is Damon Hill!"

"Michael Schumacher leading Damon Hill by four tenths of a second or so, because it's moving ... and that's not four tenths of a second, that's Michael Schumacher!"

"And Damon Hill is coming into the pit lane, yes it's Damon Hill coming into the Williams pit ... and Damon Hill is in the pit ... No, it's Michael Schumacher!"

"Coulthard leads the Europe GP, and now all he needs to do is avoid trouble, OH THATS COULTHARD OUT!!!"

Murray: "Thats a Benetton upside down"
Martin: "It's a Sauber"

"Hill congratulates Schumacher. They are not bosom buddies, but they're not far off!"

"And that's an engine blowing!! It's .... it's Damon Hill ... euggghhh..."

"He doesn't know - but if anyone knows, he would."

"Alesi is in second place with Hill in second place!"

"And on lap 72 out of 71 Damon Hill leads!!"

Murray: "How do they do that, Martin? How does a man talk calmly and especially to his team boss, when Damon in the situation he's in?"
Martin Brundle: "Well, you press a little button on the steering wheel and start talking, Murray."

"Damon Hill is leading and behind him are the second and third men!"

"The two McLaren drivers are so hot they look like 2 fried lobsters in silver suits"

".. the yellow intimidating colour of that Ferrari ..."

"That's history. I say history because it happened in the past"

"Rene Arnoux is coming into the pits ... lets stop the startwatch"

"..in fact IF is F1 spelt backwards!"

"It's lap 26 of 58, which unless I'm very much mistaken is half way"

"Two McLarens on the first row of the grid, two Ferraris on the first row of the grid..."

"Blown it for Ferrari!!!......Blown it for Irvine!!!.......I don't know what happened, but there was a major malmisorganization problem there!!!"

"..and Michael Schumacher is leading Michael Schumacher"

"And here comes Mika Hakkinen, double world champion twice over..."

"Its Senna, its Senna,"
Pause.. "its either Mansell or Senna."

When Pedro Diniz's Sauber caught fire " Fire! Fire! Diniz in the oven"
"Freedom of Budapest for Bernie Ecclestone. Theres a laugh. He could buy the place and still have enough left for Berlin."


"So let's assume that Michael Schumacher wins this race, whoa!" (Schuey slides on a white line just as Murray talks about him)


James: "Situations like this, Murray, sometimes give rise to the funniest little things. There's one portable toilet at the end of the pit-lane. Michael Schumacher decided immediately upon rejoining the grid he wanted to go to it. And shortly afterwards Mika Hakkinen and Ralf Schumacher arrived and had to stand in an orderly queue while Michael spent a penny, and they all came back out again."
Murray: "So the Germans got to the loo first of all."

"McLaren and Ferrari have won six races each this year. Mika Hakkinen has won three, David Coulthard has won three, Michael Schumacher has won five and Rubens Barrichello has won five."

"And the rain came down and washed the circuit dry"

"...and Schumacher has just completed lap 77 out of 73"

"Coulthard leads the Europe GP, and now all he needs to do is avoid trouble, OH THATS COULTHARD OUT!!!"

"The Jordans lead on lap 40 and errr.. If you haven't got your heart in your mouth then you jolly well should have!"

"Damon Hill leads as Ayrton Senna sits in the pit lane!"
Moments later.. "Ayrton Senna leads, it was the lapped car of Alain Prost that went through."

"And Michael is lapping about two seconds a lap slower than his brother Michael." (when M Schumacher was about to lap R Schumacher).

"BAR are 4th in the constructors championship, this is an excellent performance considering their debut year in 1991!"

M.W "Here comes the Minardi of Marc Gene!"
M.B "That's Badoer, Murray!"

"You can't see Alesi's Ferrari because it isn't there!"

"Jean Alesi is reborn. Last year he was driving a car that he couldn't have done well in even if it had had two engines in it, never mind one."

Murray: "Now we go on to another 16 races, the next one is at Brazil, Sao Paulo, in two weeks time."
Martin: "I'm going to Malaysia, first, Murray."

"And David Coulthard does stay ahead of Coulthard." (Personally, I don't think David is THAT fast - Sorry McLaren fans!!!)

"It will have been another victory for the Ferrari quartet - Michael Schumacher, Jean Todt, Ross Brawn, Rory Byrne, and, to make it five, Paulo Martinelli."

Murray: "That's Ralf Schumacher, you can see the cooling elements from his balaclava helmet sticking out over his forehead." (he then realises...) "They're not the cooling elements - " (laughing) "that's his hair!"

"Senna is 3rd with Mansell 2nd and Piquet 3rd!"

Murray: "First man out is Marques in the Arrows. Of course he's going out early to generate some media interest"
Martin:"I'm sure he would generate some interest if he went out in the Arrows because Marques drives for Minardi"

"This will be Williams' first win since the last time a Williams won."

"By the way, 1kg of fuel is equivalent to 0.02 s per lap"

"[Ralf] Schumacher has recovered ..."
... and as he says the word "recovered", Ralf goes off.

"If that isn't a lap record I'll eat the hat I don't normally wear."

"And the Williams pit are getting ready for Hill, the tyre coolers are coming off"

"We're now on the 73rd lap and the next one will be the 74th."

"Mansell is slowing it down, taking it easy. Oh no he isn't! It's a lap record."

"It's not quite a curve, it's a straight actually." (referring to the Tamburello at Imola)

"The status quo could well be as it was before."

"Jenson Button is in the top ten, in eleventh position."

"And there's the man in the green flag!"

"The Jordan factory is at the factory gates."

"This is an interesting circuit because it has inclines, and not just up, but down as well."

"Only a few more laps to go and then the action will begin, unless this is the action, which it is."

"And the first five places are filled by five different cars."

"So now you're looking at the battle between Frentzen and Herbert for 7th place. Heinz Harald Frentzen in the Sauber Mercedes behind Johnny Herbert, behind him Johnny Herbert in his first race in the Ligier Renault."

"We're watching the Finnish Driver who is third, but he won't for very much llllong ...oh yeah, he might be actually."

"And an enormous gap building before Mika Hakkinen goes through in third position...when I say enormous it's 1.5 seconds."

"The Benetton handling superbly as ever. Williams have worked very very hard on this car at the beginning of the season."

"I'll stop my startwatch"

"Either the car is stationary or its on the move."

"Tambay's hopes, which were previously nil, are now absolutely zero."

"That was exactly the same place where Senna overtook Nannini that he didnt overtake Alain Prost."

"A mediocre season for Nelson Piquet, as he is now known, and always has been."

"Two laps to go, then the action will begin. Unless this is the action, which it is."

"The atmosphere is so tense you could cut it with a cricket stump."

"There's only a second between them. One. Thats how long a second is."

"And it's Mansell, Mansell, Mansell Nigel Mansell."[it was actually Alain Prost]

"Alboreto has dropped back up to fifth place."

"He is shedding buckets of adrenaline in that car."

"And this is the third placed car about to lap the second placed car."

"And now excuse me while I interrupt myself"

"We all make mistakes and I certainly made a whopper there".

Murray: "I don't make mistakes. I  make proph...."
And joining the list of retirements......Murray Walker!

Murray's
written
his
book!!!
(Click on the pic
below it buy it now.)

Murray Walker
Click here to buy Murray's book
Autobiography

Formula1 Heroes
Click here to buy Murray's "Formula1 Heroes"

.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Joining the list of retirements.....Murray Walker!

Murray Walker





































































Murray: "Unless I'm very much mistaken....."

Murray Walker
 
 
 
 
 
 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
The greatest
autobiography
in the world!!!

Murray Walker
Click here to buy Murray's book
Autobiography

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Murray's
written
his
book!!!
(Click on the pic
below it buy it now.)

Murray Walker
Click here to buy Murray's book
Autobiography

Murray Walker
Click here to buy Murray's book
Autobiography

Click Here

Visitors:

A jam-packed jokes website with over 1000 hilarious bar-room, blond, quick and assorted jokes and funny pictures and cartoons.

UK Gardens